Many are aware of the story of how God brought His people out of Egypt and away from the persecution Pharaoh. It is a famous story of a down trodden people who were less than favored by the insidious ruler of Egypt. These people, the Israelites, were slaves. Their lives were hard and full of pain. However, they had God’s favor.
Before God brought them to the Promise land they lived in a land ridden with blood, sweat, tears, brutality, and harshness. There was no hope for them in Egypt. Then God raised up a leader named Moses who would bring these chosen people into the land he promised Abraham; a land filled with richness, vastness and full of promise.
From the moment the Lord brought them out Egypt, the children of Israel tested His patience by murmuring and complaining about the food (manna from Heaven) and constantly speaking unbelief in God's promise of the Promise Land. Numbers Chapter: 14 records the most impressive and important bit of lessoned learned when one is going through a testing period (wilderness): Our attitude towards God. Are we complaining over and over about our situation, and from the complaining do we allow the seed of unbelief to sprout in our life causing our never-ending existence in the wilderness?
Many say the Lord was able to physically bring the children of Israel from Egypt, unfortunately they remained in bondage to Egyptian life, mentally and spiritually. When the Children of Israel complained that all they had to eat was the manna from Heaven, God sent them pheasants to eat. He supplied all their needs, even their clothes did not wear out after being forty years in the desert. The only thing that the Lord asked for in return was obedience.
What the Israelites experienced is very similar to that which Josh and I have experienced this year. At the start of the season we were in Austria (our Egypt); a place that seemed promising. They were going to cover the birth of our daughter, offer us a 2 bedroom apartment that would be furnished for the baby. The opportunity was new and sounded glorious. However, upon arriving there, it was anything BUT glorious.
I prayed and prayed that God would spare us, and open a door for us to get out of the mess we had gotten ourselves into. Just when it seemed like there was no way out, God opened a door that only He could open. How coincidental that the open door leads to Israel; where it had lead many times before when we were in trouble. First there was the time Josh needed to leave a bad situation in Poland, God took him to Israel, then the time when he was left unsigned until November…God opened a door in Israel…and now, when we needed out more than ever, God opened the door to His promise land.
So here we are in the promise land right? While I once saw Israel as our “way out” of our situation in Austria I find myself like the Israelites, complaining and desiring more. I hated our apartment, then one day the team decided to move us to a beautiful apartment. I hated my stove at my old place and then I didn’t have one at our new place. I loved my microwave, and then I didn’t have one at our new place….little inconveniences made me look back at our “old” place, I remember despising, and somehow caused me to want to return.
Now, we are two weeks from delivering our daughter. I am at it again. My faith has dwindled (after I saw how miraculously God worked in our case to get us out of Austria) I still find myself remembering how Austria was going to pay for Roselyn’s birth wondering if it was worth the move. Now I am here in Israel with no one helping us. We are paying for all of my doctors visits, medicines, tests out of pocket…now we are faced with paying for our daughter’s visits out of pocket. All of these costs that could have been avoided in Austria are causing me to look back and say… ‘hmmm maybe that wasn’t so bad” when in reality I know it was THAT BAD!
How did I get here? How did I forget that God has not left me nor forsaken me? Why have I begun to worry, fear and complain? I know I have it all here…all but prenatal insurance. Why am I complaining? How do I stop? What blessings have I missed out on while being too worried about “me”? What directions did I bypass from God while worrying about “me”?
I have to make a choice to trust in God, and all that is going on around us. Though we are in the promise land, and things don’t look or feel very promising, we have to trust that it is in God’s hands and that he means us no harm. I have to find the faith I had, the faith that got us here…the faith that said, God will provide. I have 2 weeks or less to find that faith. I am making a choice to leave this wilderness I have been walking in for 4 months and to choose God and put all of my trust in him. I will not fear for the Lord is my Shepherd, He is my strong tower, He is my Jehovah Jira (my provider).
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